Nuts and Psychopaths

I always stick it out to the end of the game, too.  Especially at Notre Dame.  I like to watch the team salute the student section and sing the alma mater.  That's as close as I ever get to religion.  Unfortunately, my buddy and his brother were my ride and they wanted to cut out early at the USF game so I had to go.  I didn't feel as bad as I might have had there not been long weather delays.  The strange circumstances made it okay with me.

I totally get why other people like Fantasy Football.  I just don't.  Plus, I hate the Fantasy owners who get all pissed at coaches for not running the ball more or for splitting time with their running backs or whatever.  It's Fantasy Football, dude.  That's the deal.  You're playing a fantasy while these coaches and players only have the responsibility to win.  The uncertainty of whether the coach is going to leave your running back in for goal line situations is what should make it fun, not make you rage at him on Twitter.

It's funny that you say that stand-up suits me.  Or maybe it's more funny that I turned out to be an improviser.  When I was younger all of my friends would watch Saturday Night Live but I would watch a show called Comic Strip Live that aired at the same time.  It was just a bunch of stand-ups doing their thing.  Even though I loved watching stand-up, it never occurred to me that I could do that.  I assumed it was for funny people and I didn't think of myself as a funny person.  The point is, life is weird and I should try more stand-up.

I hate fishing.  It's boring.  I grew up near lakes and we would go fishing all the time.  Even when I caught something it wasn't very exciting.  My brothers loved it, though.  However, there was a summer when the town ordered a "fish kill" on bluegill fish.  They were overpopulating the lakes and wrecking the ecosystem or some shit.  Anyway, if you caught a bluegill you were supposed to throw it on the shore to die (no one ate bluegill).  My buddy Carl and I decided that we would help out.  We got his BB guns, chucked a piece of bread in the water and when the bluegill came up to eat the bread, we shot them.  It's amazing that we didn't turn out to be mass murderers.

I guess my post is all about how I hate "manly" things.  I'd talk about how I hate baseball, but that sport is in no way manly at all.

The ingredients label on my container of almonds reads:

INGREDIENTS: Almonds.
MAY CONTAIN PEANUTS AND OTHER TREE NUTS

I've never encountered a peanut or other tree nut while eating from one of these containers.  Also, I like the phrase "tree nut."