Undercover ROTC

Quinoa?  As in, the grain-like crop that is a species of goosefoot that is mainly grown for its edible seeds? Yeah, I've never heard of it.  The Wikipedia article makes it sound very nutritious.  A grain that is also a complete protein?  That's amazing!  Clearly proof that god exists! (God doesn't exist.)

Now that I'm done being an asshole about it, I'll have to try some.

People are not good about picking up their dog's poop.  In fact, people are downright terrible at picking up their dog's poop.  I thought it was just my neighborhood, but it's everywhere.  Simply due to the fact that I've picked up my dog's poop more than once (I do it every time, by the way) puts me in the top 99th percentile of responsible dog owners in this city.

I love that undercover cop cars aren't really undercover at all.  It's always painfully obvious which cars are unmarked cop cars and which are regular people's cars.  No one is fooled by this.  I suspect that they don't actually want to fool people but simply not put people on edge.

You should also employ Gmail's filtering options.  It allows you to automatically add labels as emails come in.  You can even have them skip the inbox and go directly to their designated folder.  I do that with a lot of the Yelp and Gap-type emails.  You know how sometimes pH emails get out of control with everyone trying to be super hilarious and they keep replying to the whole cast and you're eventually like, "Enough with the bits!  I know rehearsal time has changed, leave me alone."  You know what I'm talking about.  Anyway, select the conversation, click on the "More" button at the top of your inbox and click "Mute" and you won't have to get any more of those stupid bit emails.  I do this all the time.

I have had my pupils dilated.  Before I went to college I had to get a physical from the Air Force (because I was going to be in ROTC).  They were very thorough.  There was a chance that I might become a pilot so they did all sorts of funky eye tests.  At one point they put dye in my eyes and I saw everything as blue or red or whatever color the dye was.  I think that was to test colorblindness.  Or maybe it was to insert a tracking chip into my brain.  I don't know.  I do remember sitting in the lobby waiting for the effects of the various dyes to wear off so they could put different stuff in.  It was weird and took a long time.  My grandfather had to guide me out of the building.  I dropped out of ROTC during my sophomore year so it was all for nothing.  It wasn't all for nothing.  I did get a funny hat out of the deal.